Am I defective or something?
2004-05-03, 4:26 p.m.

AM I a leper? Jesus Christ! I had to drive my fathers friend to his CT scan and it was at Madigan Army Medical Center. While I was waiting I was looking at the people walking in. There are some ugly people in the world but yet they are with someone. I saw this one girl that was so much bigger than me and she wasnt pregnant. She wasnt even decent looking I mean WOOF WOOF but she was holding hands with this young military guy who was actually cute. I was thinking what the hell? I cant even get a phone number yet these girls are married to good looking guys. Then that got me thinking. I cant even score with the ugliest, stupidest, dorkiest, geekiest, going no where loser. There has to be something seriously wrong here. I know I have a nice personality. ( not lately cause of the whole being rejected all the time. The Ice Princess is back) But generally I am a nice person. I am not ugly. At least I dont think I am not stupid. I dont really have any deformaties. What the fuck? I am now more than ever determined to get all thin and get some major vengence. I am gonna destroy every male that I can. Until then I am gonna get a website going where I can post pictures of my progress and have a link to them. So whomever reads this can tell me if I am being paranoid or just that I am flat out a dog. Someone needs to tell me that is not partial. Anyways I just wanted to vent. Argh off to go work out. Someone just kill me now.